No Voice.

I lost my voice. I sure hope I find it soon. Work will be very difficult with no voice, and that will be poopy. Besides, I LOVE to talk... how will I survive? Well, maybe I'll write more later...

You Want My What?!

I got this phone call today... some telemarketer, I guess. He was from India. Well, he *sounded* like he was from India. He could have very possibly been in New York.

Anyway, he said Jeremy had $10,000 coming to him from the government, and all he needed was our bank account number.

Pshyeah, I'm going to give my bank account number out over the phone. Do I have stupid written on my forehead?

I asked him to prove he was a real company. He replied, "Just give me your account number, and then I'll prove it." Mmhmm... yeah... sure.

*emmett* ~ who, just for your information, does NOT give out bank account info over the phone...

Jaywalking and Laziness.

I think something's wrong with me. My house is a little messy, and I don't care that much. This is probably a good thing.

I'm feeling very lazy lately. All I want to do is surf the internet and eat frozen cookie dough balls. Mmmm... those are so tasty.

Speaking of being lazy... You know something that bothers me? Jaywalkers. I mean, I know they bother a lot of people, but they've been bothering me *more* lately. They stand there and wait, looking for the perfect time to cross, but they *still* make traffic stop for them.

Why did they wait then? And why do they always cross about twenty feet away from a crosswalk? Wouldn't it save more time to just *walk* to the crosswalk?! I mean, you'd think it would since they're standing there anyway looking for the *perfect* time to cross, and there isn't a perfect time because it's not a crosswalk and therefore, cars are continuously moving. Bah! Stupid jaywalkers.

That is all.

*emmett* ~ who will probably end up cleaning like a crazy person here soon... while eating frozen cookie dough balls...

Cake is Good.

Last night I had three pieces of cake after dinner. Three. And I had one right before work so that means I had four pieces of yummy, super-tasty, chocolatey cake in six hours. Wow. I love cake. That is all.

*emmett* ~ who really loves cake and is very glad she made one

I'm Not a Child Molestor! SHEESH!

I got my job back! Woohoo! Yeah... I'm stoked. My boss called me the other day and said, "We've decided that you're *not* a child molestor." Well, ya think?! Pfff...

I missed my girls so much. That is all. Thanks for the well-wishes.

*emmett* ~ who has really been craving cookie dough... not cookies, but cookie dough :)

p.s. I made some cookie dough. It tastes best frozen. Screw the thought of raw eggs being bad for you.

Happy 101st!

Okay, so I know I just wrote an entry like twenty minutes ago, but I just realized that it was my 100th entry, and I promised myself that it would be special and neat. But it wasn't. LOL. It was my first REAL entry about my life... not just another funny story. Well I guess, in a way, that does make it special. It was something new and different for me, even if it was depressing. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you something else. :)

I hate television. I mean, I hate *watching* television. There are only three shows I watch, and I don't even turn on the TV to pass the time. It doesn't even cross my mind. I love The Ellen DeGeneres Show though, and I NEVER miss it. I record it if I can't see it that day. Ellen never fails to make me laugh, and she dances every day on her show, which is just sweet-ass. Oprah does NOT do that. ;)

The other shows I watch are Extreme Makeover: Home Edition and Desperate Housewives (aka DH, not to be confused with DH "Darling/Dear Husband", but I never refer to my husband as such. I will just come out and say "Jeremy"). Yeah... so... both of which are probably in the rest of America's top two. Tee hee.

Anywho, I didn't get to see DH this last week because we were vacationing in Vermont so I recorded it and got to watch it tonight. And I seriously don't think I've ever been this excited over watching a television show. Maybe it had just been so long since I had last seen it. I'm not sure, but it really is a guilty pleasure when I'm squirming with delight during the opening credits. LOL. I was just sitting there laughing at myself... all giddy and goofy that I could lose myself for an hour... forget about my job (or lack thereof) and get wrapped into the lives of the women on Wisteria Lane. Thank you, ABC. Thank you for giving me time off from my sorrow. I appreciate that... now and for every Sunday evening with those ladies left to come. :)

Happy 101st diaryland entry to me!

*emmett* ~ who loves those Desperate Housewives, and isn't afraid to admit it...

A Silly Misunderstanding.

This is embarrassing, but it's happening in my life, so I'm sharing it. *sigh*

Okay, so yeah, I'm a gymnastics coach, right? Well, okay, a few months ago, a 14-year-old gymnast/summer-staff-member needed a ride home because her dad was working. It was late (9 pm). The gym was closing. We called her dad and got permission for me to take her home since it's against policy for a staff member to take home a child. BUT, she's also a staff member so then, that should be okay. I still got permission though, because I am a responsible adult.

Then today, I was fired for it. They just made a mistake... a misunderstanding. But I'm paying for it, and it sucks. I'm fighting for my job though, don't get me wrong. But really, can I go back if they apologize? Eh... I guess I'll have to see what happens. I love my job. I'm good at what I do. And this just sucks. Sorry this is a bummer of an entry, but I thought I should let you all know that I'm severely bummed out right now. *humph*

I'm even losing sleep over this, which I hate. I slept a total of three hours last night, and now it's one in the morning, and I don't feel like I can sleep. Bah.

*emmett* ~ who is rarely 'down in the dumps', but really is today...

p.s. I started another diary for the funny things that the Twinkies say. It's quite cute. Please take a look if you get a chance. :)

Best Husband Ever!

Umm... yeah... I have the best husband EVER!

Who needs chocolate, flowers or jewelry? *My* talented husband wrote me a SONG! That's right... a song. He sang it and played the guitar. All words and music written by him. For me. All mine. About me. And it was so lovely and sweet. I cried.

I'm trying to get him to record it so you all can hear it. He's working on it, but he's a perfectionist so it's taking a bit. He's so sweet, and I'm so blessed. He's the best husband ever. That is all.

*emmett* ~ who has the best husband ever

p.s. Did I mention I have the best husband ever?

Happy Valentine's Day... Want Some Bling?

I was talking to my mom today, and she actually used the word "bling" in the right context. Yeah, that was weird. I laughed at her.

So anyway... about the bling... I'm a simple girl. I don't wear jewelry. When I was in college, I wore earrings (only studs) EVERY day. I also wore a necklace EVERY day, but mostly just because I had a boyfriend, who gave me a very nice heart necklace, and I loved it.

When I *do* wear jewelry, I'm VERY picky. It took me seven months *after* we were married to even find a wedding ring set I liked. :) Now, I don't even wear the set (except when I go out to restaurants or to visit family); I only wear the engagement one, which is a small gold band with five small diamonds. :) And technically, I wouldn't even call it an engagement ring because, like I said, I got it seven months after we were married. So... it's more like just half my wedding set... the half that doesn't catch on things or scratch people. :)

Anyway... I keep getting off track here, but I needed to provide you with some background for my bling story...

So... my mom was telling me how her first Valentine's Day with my dad, they both got each other cross necklaces without knowing what the other was getting (aww... how sweet... yada yada yada). And I announced, "I want jewelry now, Mom!" To which she replied, "You finally want some bling, huh?! Well, it's about time!" See why I laughed at her? Tee hee.

Bummer thing is... Jeremy isn't really into the Valentine's Day present thing. He likes to make my gifts, which is sweet, but once... one time while we're married... I'd like jewelry or flowers. :)

Not A LOT of jewelry. Actually, while I'm married to him for the rest of our lives, I will only ask for two jewelry things: a set of 1/4 carat, princess cut diamond earrings (from... wherever) and the sterling silver starfish necklace from Tiffany&Co. :) That's all I ask. Nothing more, really. And he knows these things. I figure we've only been married for (a little over) two years. He has time... plenty of time. :) Just thought I'd let you all know.

*emmett* ~ who is excited for her present this year because he stayed home from my high school girls' state championship gymnastics meet to work on it :)

Samara Has Nothing on Matthew...

Last night on American Idol, there was this dude named Matthew. His voice sounded EXACTLY like a woman. And as I was sitting there watching this very womanly voice come out of this tall man, I cried. I cried because that was the creepiest thing I think I've ever witnessed.

I'M.DEAD.SERIOUS. I was, honest to God, scared. I liked his voice though. Really, I did. It was just... you know... scary.

*emmett* ~ who wasn't even scared during "Hide and Seek"

Watch Out For That... uhhh... Deer.

Well, at least one deer (yes, deer) wasn't happy about George W's continuation as President...

Last night while in the bus coming home from our high school gymnastics meet (yeah, we're 8 and 1 now... we rock!), a huge deer thought he'd (or she'd) attempt suicide by jumping eight feet high (no, I'm *not* exaggerating) in front of the bus.

In the process, the whole right-side of the bus's windshied shattered. The silly deer also bent the 12-inch mirror around the side of the bus and broke all the glass (no more glass now). Also... another mirror completely got torn from the bus. The bus driver lost control for a second, and we ran over all kinds of crap (who knows what, really), and yeah, it was just scary. But it's okay, children! I'm okay. I was a little shaken up, but no biggie.

Oh, yeah, and the deer? Yeah, he got up and hobbled back into the forest. I'm only guessing though because when we looked back, there was not a deer (or deer head) in sight. Weird stuff happens on Inauguration Day, I tell ya.

*emmett* ~ who hopes the little deer is safe... and a little wiser...

p.s. Edited to say: The bus driver *said* it was a deer. (There was NO way a deer could have survived that!) We think she did this to save herself the embarrassment. She actually ran into a stop sign. She must have been tired. That was SCARY!

Happy Birthday, Mairen!

Happy Birthday today to my new niece, Mairen Elizabeth Rinaldi. :)

And kudos to my sister, Shaina. She went to the hospital at 11:00 last night. And then at 1:34 a.m., she had this 20-inch, almost-nine-pound-chub (8 lbs. 13.5 oz actually) *naturally*... no drugs! Go, Shaina! You're the woman!

Mairen joins her two older twin sisters, Alaura Dawn and Brenna Rey (aka "The Twinkies"). And I get to see her this weekend! AND my best friend, Hanna, is flying 3,000 miles to see *me* on Saturday. Woohoo! A new niece *and* my best friend... all in the same week. Yay me!

*emmett* ~ who is *very* excited

Awww... Memories.

I love the super-good feeling I get inside me when I see things from my childhood. This is happening more and more recently now that the old 1980s toys are coming back. Like when I see My Little Ponies or Holly Hobbie or Full House. *sigh* I love the feeling. It's like deep in my soul... a warm, feel-good feeling. I love it. Memories are nice. :)

*emmett* ~ who now wants to collect Holly Hobbie stuff...

Christmas and Stuff.

Happy New Year... and stuff.

I hate New Year's resolutions. I never make them. Okay, that's not true. I made one once... several years ago. And I became very obsessive-compulsive about it because everybody knows that people never keep resolutions.

So yeah, I kept that one. It was to wash my hands more. And I do... obsessively... like I said. I even wash my hands after I go pee, and I'm about to get in the shower and be all soapy. So yeah, obsessed. But on the other hand (as I'm just this second realizing), I've been sick a lot less. :-) I did have one hell of a case of bronchitis (complete with a fever) all through the holidays though. Yeah, that sucked.

So Christmas was good. I got almost everything I asked for... but then again, I only had about six things on my list. :) So I now just need to get myself a soup cookbook (Book of Soups) and some cloth grocery bags with the Christmas money I got. :)

I have more to say, but I don't feel like making this a long entry. I'll try to talk about "why I think New Year's Day as a holiday is stupid" another day. :)

*emmett* ~ who thinks that New Year's Day as a holiday is stupid

O Christmas... WHOA! That Tree is HUGE!

I don't like name-calling. I mean, even though I'm terrible at times, and in my mind I'm thinking, "Gosh, that is so white-trash." Or "What a redneck!" I would never say those things out loud, and I would never let people know that I *think* those things... *ahem*

Anyway, I have a story to tell you. And it has nothing whatsoever to do with what I just said. Nothing. At all. Nope. Nada. Mm-hmm... yeah.

So my next door neighbors... They let their 4-year-old daughter pick out their Christmas tree. Yeah, she picked out one that was over TWELVE feet high. Kid you not. (I know that I tend to exaggerate, but really this story is so crazy, I don't even have to! *That's* how crazy it is! *I*, me, Emmett. I *don't* have to exaggerate this story.)

Anyway... And our ceilings? Yeah, they're 7.5 feet tall.

So they actually brought that tree home. Yes, and it was sitting outside on their back-porch. And I swear to God, you could climb up that tree and then climb into their 2nd story window if you wanted to. I mean, if you *wanted* to. I'm just sayin'.

I asked them what possessed them to buy a tree that large. Their answer? "It didn't look *that* big at the lot." How could it not look that big? It's almost three times the height of the wife! And it was *in* the ground at the tree farm, meaning it was *taller* there than it was when they brought it home.

So yeah, the story gets worse. "But Emmett..." You ask "... what could *possibly* be more stupid than buying a twelve foot Christmas tree for 7-foot ceilings." Yeah, they actually tried to move it into the house. Mm-hmm. I'm being serious. Nope, not joking. Needless to say, it didn't fit. Pfff.

They ended up sawing off part of the tree so they could fit it in the house. No, they didn't saw off the *bottom* half to bring that part into the house. That would have been funny though, wouldn't it? Tee hee.

*emmett* ~ who is smart enough to *ask* the height of the tree before she purchases one...