More of Worm and a Stunning Dress.

Diary of a Worm - Day 2

"March 29:

Today I tried to teach Spider how to dig. First of all his legs got stuck.

Spider: I think I've twisted one of my ankles.

Then he swallowed a bunch of dirt.

Worm: I give up!

Tomorrow he's going to teach me how to walk upside down.

April 1:

Worms cannot walk upside down."

I just love that book. Tee hee.

In other news, I'm looking for bridesmaid dresses for myself and the two other bridesmaids for my sister's wedding.

While searching on eBay, I found this "stunning" dress. Green. Poofy. Hideous. Had the word "stunning" in the item title. Mmmmm... stunning. Not exactly the word I'd use for it. That's got to be one of the ugliest dresses I've ever seen in my life. Even uglier than the bridesmaid dress I had to wear to my aunt's wedding. And that, my friends, was bad! Thank God I have a sister with taste. :)

*emmett* ~ who actually thinks she found the perfect dress... but dear God, it does not look like *that* one :)

2nd One For Today, But I Love Pudding.

I bought some pudding at the grocery store today. I forgot how much I love pudding.

That is all.

*emmett* ~ who loves pudding

Diary of a Worm.

I bought the BEST book today! No seriously, this is way better than that Harry Potter stuff that people seem to enjoy so much. So you want to know what it is? It's called Diary of a Worm by Doreen Cronin.

Seriously... it's hysterical! Sure it's a children's book, but you need to run to the bookstore or library and read it (it's fairly short). And if you're too lazy to do that (I would be... LOL), maybe I'll post a page per day. The stuff that I put in these: [ ] are little talking/thinking bubbles done by the characters of the book. :) So here's today's:

"March 20

Mom says there are three things I should always remember:

1. The earth gives us everything we need.

2. When we dig tunnels, we help take care of the earth. [Must make tunnel -- help earth breathe!]

3. Never bother Daddy when he's eating the newspaper. [CHOMP!]"

That's a pretty cute first page... but it gets better. I know you're holding your breath just waiting for tomorrow. I *know* you can't wait! But good things come to those who wait patiently. :)

*emmett* ~ who loves her new book and actually paid FULL price for it! (She never pays full price for anything... especially books. LOL.)

2nd One For Today, but I Had to Share...

I really want some biscuits. That is all.

*emmett* ~ who really wants some biscuits...

I Don't Think There is Such Thing as an "Easy Job."

Okay, so a few weeks ago, I got a job. I babysit a puppy (Shiba-Inu). I know what you're all saying, "Awww, how cute!" "Wow, what a sweet job!" "Girl, you've got it easy!" Well, I'm just here to tell you... YOU'RE ALL WRONG. LOL. I mean... just think about it. If it was so easy, he wouldn't need to be puppy-sat in the first place.

Okay, this dog is like SUPER hyper. I know all puppies are hyper at first, but this puppy is like Tazmanian-Devil-on-speed hyper! I really can't handle that.

He picks on little Ruby too, which makes me very sad. I'm constantly saying, "Fox! No!" "Fox! Don't do that!" "Fox! Stop!" Maybe he'd act like a good puppy if I used his real name. Yes? Tee hee... okay, his name is Rocky, but I like the name Fox. :) I do call him Rocky though. I just would *like* to call him Fox. ;-)

But... when you're a pet sitter, you don't get to just go around changing the pets' names because you don't like the name that the owner gave. What's that about? I mean... *I'm* the one watching him twelve hours a day, shouldn't I get to call him what I'd like? NOOOOO! Oh well. Rocky's fine... I suppose... ;-)

So yeah, it's not easy, and don't even think I'm being a wimp. I'm not. :)

I suppose the job would be a *bit* easier if I didn't have Ruby and Amber here. He likes to pick on them. But they are my *babies*!! Actually, Amber and Rocky have been playing lately. That's cool. She opens a can of puppy-whoop-ass if he gets too postal on her... especially if he picks on little Ruby... Amber really wails on him then. That's pretty sweet. My puppies are awesome.

So yeah... next time you think that having three puppies in your house (one in constant need of Ritalin) is "so fun": think again. That's all, little monkeys. :)

*emmett* ~ who really does enjoy her job... and gets paid pretty well too...

A Day with the Bliss Family is Pure... Bliss.

I used to babysit for a family with seven children. I met them nine years ago... when there was only five of them (and their youngest was nine months old). Now they range in age from 4 to 15. I got to see them on Friday, and it was super fun. They said some pretty funny things. Here's a conversation we had:

Elizabeth (age 13): Sam, go put on jeans because we're going to the boardwalk, and you can't wear nice clothes!

Sam (age 7): I LIKE these pants, and I'm not changing!

Katairena (age 12): Come on, Sam! Please?

Me: Yeah, Sam, it won't be fun if you're all hot in those clothes.

Sam: I'm not wearing jeans! I didn't even bring jeans!

Barrie-Rose (age 10): Well, just go take those off and put some other ones on!

Elizabeth: Yeah! I'll give you a quarter?

Sam: (puts hands on hips) How about two dollars!

Elizabeth: Okay, how about fifty cents?

Sam: A dollar!

Elizabeth: no way!

Sam: Okay... then you each give me a quarter, and that will make a dollar.

(We all agree, and he goes to change. A little while later, the youngest sibling comes up to us after Sam must have showed her what he'd gotten.)

Collette (age 4): Hey! I'm wearing jeans! Where's *my* dollar?

We all laugh hysterically.

Me: Good one, Collette!

Collette: (puts her hands on her hips) I'm being serious!

We all laugh again. Tee hee. Kids are so sweet. I'll miss them so much when I leave. :-(

*emmett* ~ who loves these kids more than anything :)